“Mankind has a perfect record in aviation. We never left one up there!”
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A bloke walks into a Glasgow library
A man took his dog to the cinema.
Walking with neighbor
I spent $5000 on a boob job for the wife. She was delighted.
I spent another $2000 on a nose job for her. She was ecstatic.
I spent $2000 on liposuction for her and she was over the moon.
I spent $30 on a blow job for myself and she goes fucking mental.
A bloke walks into a Glasgow library and says to the prime librarian, ‘Excuse me Miss, dey ye hiv ony books on suicide?’
She stops doing her tasks, looks at him over the top of her glasses and says, ‘Buzz off, ye’ll no bring it back!’
A man took his dog to the cinema. At the end of the film the dog applauded.
“That’s amazing,” said the usherette.
“Yes, it is,” said the man. “He didn’t think much of the book.”
DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this newsletter. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.
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