Chuck's Blog

OUR LIGHTER SIDE 2/4/2010

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The year is 1947

Holy Bath Night

Cartoon-lease

       Some of you will recall that on July 8, 1947, a little over 60
       years ago, witnesses claim that an unidentified flying object
       (UFO) with five aliens aboard crashed onto a sheep and mule
       ranch just outside Roswell , New Mexico . This is a well known
       incident that many say has long been covered up by the U.S. Air
       Force and other federal agencies and organizations.

       However, what you may NOT know is that in the month of April
       1948, nine months after that historic day, the following people
       were born:

       Albert A. Gore, Jr..
       Hillary Rodham
       John F. Kerry
       William J. Clinton
       Howard Dean
       Nancy Pelosi
       Dianne Feinstein
       Charles E. Schumer
       Barbara Boxer

       See what happens when aliens breed with sheep and jackasses?
       I certainly hope this bit of information clears up a lot of
       things for you. It did for me.

       No wonder they support the bill to help illegal aliens!
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Holy  Bath  Night

It was time for Father John’s Saturday night bath and the young nun, Sister Magdalene, had prepared the bath water and towels just the way the old nun had instructed.
Sister Magdalene was also instructed not to look at Father John’s nakedness if she could help it, do whatever he told her to do, and pray.
The next morning the old nun asked Sister Magdalene how the Saturday night bath had gone.
‘Oh, sister,’ said the young nun dreamily, ‘I’ve been saved.’

‘Saved? And how did that come about?’ asked the old nun..

‘Well, when Father John was soaking in the tub, he asked me to wash him, and while I was washing him he guided my hand down between his legs where he said the Lord keeps the Key to Heaven.’

‘Did he now?’ said the old nun evenly.

Sister Magdalene continued, ‘And Father John said that if the Key to Heaven fit my lock, the portals of Heaven would be opened to me and I would be assured salvation and eternal peace.  And then Father John guided his Key to Heaven into my lock.’

‘Is that a fact?’ said the old nun even more evenly.

‘At first it hurt terribly, but Father John said the pathway to salvation was often painful and that the glory of God would soon swell my heart with ecstasy.  And it did, it felt so good being saved.’

‘That wicked old bastard, said the old nun.  ‘He told me it was Gabriel’s Horn, and I’ve been blowing it for 40 years!
________________________

Cartoon-lease

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DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this newsletter. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

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Adult Humor
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Thanks,

Chuck