Chuck's Blog

OUR LIGHTER SIDE 8/28/2008

Mexican Jews

How to teach a Democrat!

You need to drink some water

Mexican Jews

Two old Jewish men, Sid and Al, are sitting in a Mexican restaurant in Los Angeles one day. Sid asks Al, ‘Do you know of any people of our faith born and raised in Mexico ?’

Al replies, ‘I don’t know, let’ s ask our waiter.’

When the waiter arrives, Al asks, ‘Are there any Mexican Jews?’

The waiter says, ‘I don’t know senor, I ask the cooks.’ He returns from the kitchen after a few minutes and says, ‘No senor, the cook say no Mexican Jews.’

Al isn’t satisfied and asks, ‘Are you absolutely sure?’

The waiter, realizing he is dealing with ‘Gringos’ replies, ‘I check once again, senor!’and goes back into the kitchen.

While the waiter is away, Sid says, ‘I find it hard to believe that there are no Jews in Mexico . Our people are scattered everywhere.’

The waiter returns and says, ‘Senor, the head cook Tom say there is no Mexican Jews.’

‘Are you certain?’ Al asks again. ‘I just can’t believe there are no Mexican Jews!’

‘SENOR, I ask EVERYONE,’ replies the exasperated waiter, ‘All we have is Orange Jews, Grape Jews, Prune Jews, and Tomato Jews.

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How to teach a Democrat!

What to do if you fall into a conversation with a liberal democrat about the terrorist attacks who doesn’t believe in retaliation:

1. Engage in conversation, and ask if military force is appropriate.

2. When he says “No,” ask, “Why not?”

3. Wait until he says something to the effect of “Because that would just cause more innocent deaths, which would be awful and we should not cause more violence.”

4. When he’s in mid sentence, punch him in the face as hard as you can.

5. When he gets back up to punch you, point out that it would be a mistake and contrary to his values to strike you, because that would be awful and he should not cause more violence.

6. Wait until he agrees, and has pledged not to commit additional violence.

7. Punch him in the face again, harder this time.

8. Repeat steps 5 through 8 until he understands that sometimes it is necessary to punch back

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You need to drink *some* water

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DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this newsletter. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

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Adult Humor
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