Chuck's Blog

OUR LIGHTER SIDE 7/31/2008

Thought for the day: A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, but she does.

A farmer finally decided to buy a TV.

Do you always wear a condom when you run?

Slap a pimp

A farmer finally decided to buy a TV. The store assured him that they
would install the antenna and TV the next day.

The next evening the farmer turned on his new TV and found only political
ads on every channel. The next morning he turned the TV on and found only
political ads again.

When he came in to eat lunch he tried the TV again but still only found
political ads.

The next day when he still found only political ads he called the store to
complain. The owner said that it was impossible for every channel to only
have political ads, but agreed to send their repairman to check the TV.

When the TV repairman turned on the TV he found that the farmer was right.
After looking at the TV for a while he went outside to check the antenna.
In a few minutes he returned and told the farmer he had found the problem.

The antenna had been installed on top of the windmill and grounded to the
manure spreader.
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A woman was having a daytime affair while her husband was at work.
One wet and blustery day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her horror, she heard her husband’s car pull into the driveway.

‘Oh my God – Hurry! Grab your clothes and jump out the window.

My husband’s home early!’

‘I can’t jump out the window ~ It’s raining out there!’

‘If my husband catches us in here, he’ll kill us both!’ she replied. ‘He’s
got a hot temper and a gun, so the rain is the least of your problems!’

So the boyfriend scoots out of bed, grabs his clothes and jumps out
the window!

As he ran down the street in the pouring rain, he quickly discovered he
had run right into the middle of the town’s annual marathon, so he
started running along beside the others, about 300 of them.

Being naked, with his clothes tucked under his arm, he tried to blend
in as best he could. After a little while a small group of runners who
had been watching him with some curiosity, jogged closer.

‘Do you always run in the nude?’ one asked.

‘Oh yes!’ he replied, gasping in air. ‘It feels so wonderfully free!’

Another runner moved a long side. ‘Do you always run carrying your
clothes with you under your arm?’

‘Oh, yes’ our friend answered breathlessly. ‘That way I can get dressed
right at the end of the run and get in my car to go home!’

Then a third runner cast his eyes a little lower and queried, ‘Do you
always wear a condom when you run?’

‘Nope………just when it’s raining.’

________________________

Slap a pimp

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DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this newsletter. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

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Adult Humor
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Thanks,

Chuck