Chuck's Blog

OUR LIGHTER SIDE 7/2/2008

My Internet connection was down last night, a big thanks to Ed for sending OLS out!

The German and the Tart

Mike goes to the local beach, and just couldn’t make it with any of the girls.

The best pool shot by a white chick

The German and the Tart

A German guy approaches a prostitute and says, ‘ I vish to buy sex vit you’

‘OK’ says the girl, ‘I’ll charge 100 Euros an hour’

‘Ist goot, But I must varn you, I am a little kinky’

‘No problem’ she replies cautiously, ‘I can do a little kinky’

So off they go to the girl’s flat, where the German produces four large bedsprings and a duck caller.

‘I vant you to tie ze springs to your handz und kneez.’ The girl finds this very strange, but complies, fastening the springs to her hands and knees.

‘Now pleez you vill get on your handz and kneez.’ She duly does this,
balancing on the springs.

‘You vill please blow zis duck caller as I make love to you.’ She finds all this very odd, but figures it’s harmless, and the guy is paying.

The sex is fantastic. The energetic German bounces her all over the room, all the time with her honking on the duck caller. The climax is the most sensational she has ever experienced, and it is several minutes before she has recovered her breath. Finally she gasps ‘That was totally amazing……. what do you call that?’

Wait For It…………………………………………….

‘Ah’, says the German, ‘Four-sprung duck technique’

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Please tell you freinds about OLS: Thanks, Chuck
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Mike goes to the local beach, and just couldn’t make it with any of the girls. So he heads over to the lifeguard tower to see if the lifeguard has any advice for him.

“Dude, it’s obvious,” says the lifeguard, “you’re wearing them baggy old swimming trunks that make you look like an old geezer. They’re years outta style. Your best bet is to grab yourself a pair of Spandex Speedos – about two sizes too small – and drop a fist-sized potato down inside ‘em. I’m tellin’ you man…you’ll have all the babes you want!”

The following weekend, Mike hits the beach with his spanking new tight Speedos and his fist-sized potato but it’s even worse than before. Everybody on the beach acts disgusted as he walks by, covering their faces, turning away, laughing, looking sick!

So Mike goes back to the lifeguard again and says to him, “I did what you told me and it didn’t work, so what’s wrong now?”

The life guard says, “Jesus, Mike, you’re supposed to put the potato in front!”

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The best pool shop by a white chick

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DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this newsletter. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

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Adult Humor
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Thanks,

Chuck