Chuck's Blog

OUR LIGHTER SIDE 9/27/2007

Two guys are drinking in a bar. One says, “Did you know that lions have sex 10 to 15 times a night?” “Damn,” says his friend, “and I just joined The Elks!!”

I have thousands of readers, but only a handful of readers send me jokes. Please send jokes and stuff to OLS and I will post your stuff! ols@ourlighterside.com

I never knew eating right could be so easy

A man and his bird

Breakfast with deer!

Yesterday I went to the doctor for my yearly physical.
My blood pressure was high, my cholesterol was high,
I’d gained some weight, and I didn’t feel so hot.
My doctor said eating right doesn’t have to be complicated and it would solve my physical
problems. He said just think in colors…

Fill your plate with bright colors…greens, yellows, reds, etc.

I went right home and ate an entire bowl of M&M’s

And sure enough, I felt better immediately. I never knew eating right could be so easy!!!

________________________

A man and his bird

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks for their orders. The man says, “A hamburger, fries and a coke,” and turns to the ostrich, “What’s yours?”
“I’ll have the same,” says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order. “That will be $9.40 please,” and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, “A hamburger, fries, and a coke.”
The ostrich says, “I’ll have the same.” Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

This becomes routine until the two enter again.

“The usual?” asks the waitress.
“No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato, and salad,” says the man.
“Same,” says the ostrich.

Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, “That will be $32.62.”

Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.

The waitress can’t hold back her curiosity any longer. “Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?”

“Well,” says the man, “several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.”

“That’s brilliant!” says the waitress. “Most people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you’ll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!”

“That’s right. Whether it’s a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there,” says the man.

The waitress asks, “But, sir, what’s with the ostrich?”

The man sighs, pauses, and answers, “My second wish was for a tall chick with a big ass and long legs who agrees with everything I say.”

________________________

Breakfast with deer! MUST see VIDEO!

Check it out under Uncategorized

**********************************
Electronic Repair Company

Quality service since 1972.

Stereo, turntable, band equipment, VCR etc.

We service sewer cams…. yeah SHIT cams!

**********************************

DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this newsletter. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

—————
Adult Humor
—————

Our Lighter side is an electronic newsletter published five days a week and sent to you from Birmingham, AL.

Please tell your friends about OLS! Would your friends enjoy receiving “Our Lighter Side”?

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Please send jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck