OUR LIGHTER SIDE 6/26/2007
Written by chuck on June 25, 2007 – 9:30 pm -Weird but the government is starting to push the debit cards and to eliminate currency. Watch out!!!!
An 80-year old man goes for a physical.
Anger Control
Gonorrhea Or Diarrhea?
Are you in a bar?
An 80-year old man goes for a physical. All of his tests come back with normal results. The doctor says, “Chuck, everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?”
Chuck replies, “God and I are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so he’s fixed it so when I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, POOF! the light goes on.
When I’m done, POOF! the light goes off. ” WOW, That’s incredible” the doctor says.
A little later in the day, the doctor calls Chuck’s wife. “Ethel,” he says, “Chuck is doing fine! But I had to call you as I am in awe of his
relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night and POOF! the light goes on in the bathroom, and when he’s done POOF! the light goes off?
“Oh my God!” Ethel exclaims. “he’s peeing in the refrigerator again.
________________________ Please tell your friends about OLS!
Anger Control
A husband asks his wife, “When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger”?
“I clean the toilet bowl.”
“How does that help”?
“I use your toothbrush.”
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Gonorrhea Or Diarrhea?
When the husband finally died his wife put the usual death notice in the paper, but added that he died of gonorrhea.
No sooner were the papers delivered when a good friend of the family phoned and complained bitterly, “You know very well that he died of diarrhea, not gonorrhea.”
Replied the widow, “I nursed him night and day so of course I know he died of diarrhea. But I thought it would be better for posterity to remember him as a great lover rather than the big shit he always was.”
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Electronic Repair Company
Quality service since 1972.
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Attention plumbers, we repair sewer cams!
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DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this newsletter. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.
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Adult Humor
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Thanks,
Chuck
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